Showing posts with label empowerment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label empowerment. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Nikki & Dino's HypnoBirthing Story

 
Nikki and Dino took Carol’s HypnoBirthing Classes on Tuesday evenings at Babies by the Sea Boutique in Cardiff, North County San Diego in February 2012.  Here is the birth story of their son, Enzo!

I'm finally getting a chance to announce the birth of our son Enzo Demitri! Enzo was born after an evening of feasting on skirt steak and tres leches for our anniversary from Qeuro and apparently Enzo liked it too! I woke up at 4 in the AM and finally felt what I thought were surges, but I still wasn't sure! Our doula, Annely, told me to go about my day as planned. I had a last minute nesting need and went to Target, Buy Buy Baby and Trader Joes. By the time I got to Trader Joes in the afternoon and the woman asked me at the check out when I was due I was starting to feel the contractions a bit more so I simply told her "I'm in labor, so any time now"..... Her face was priceless.

I came home to lie down and rest but things progressed quickly at that point and I knew I had to get in the tub. I was about 4 minutes apart consistently for a couple hours. Dino read some relaxation scripts to me and I sat in the tub breathing and listening to the Rainbow Relaxation CD for some time.

Our doula Annely arrived and labored with us for about 4 hours. The first two were great and then I started to have extremely intense back labor. Enzo was facing backward and his head was pushing against my lower back – apparently Annely could see him doing it!

We headed to the hospital and had a great staff... Although I could barely speak at this point so this info is more from Dino and our doula! At around 7-8 cm I was exhausted from the back labor and opted (demanded) the epidural at that point. The strain in my back made it extremely difficult for me to relax at that point and I knew this was the right choice at the time.

We all slept for a couple hours to wake up and deliver Enzo within the next two hours. He was born beautiful and healthy and we brought him into the world peacefully and happily.

Although our birth plan was altered and took a new path along the way, we felt educated, aware of our decisions and able to communicate effectively with our support team in a way that we felt comfortable with. 
The experience was intense, surreal, magical, and by far the best day of our lives.

Thank you to Carol and all of you for your support during this amazing process. We enjoyed every moment!



Cheers,
Nikki & Dino

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Nikki, thank you so much for sharing your story and congratulations on Enzo’s arrival!  I am so thankful to hear that you felt prepared, empowered, and educated about your choices and that you made the decisions you felt necessary for you and your family- that is my aim in teaching these classes! HypnoBirthing imparts techniques to help you remain in control of your reaction to your labor, and you did just that! Congratulations again!

If you are interested in Nikki’s doula, Annely:
http://thebumpcoach.com/

If you are interested in taking HypnoBirthing classes in San Diego, please visit our website at www.AWellLivedLife.Net to learn more and to see the schedule for upcoming classes and private session information. Carol & Kelly teach classes in North County San Diego. If their schedule doesn't fit your schedule, please contact them and they will refer you to other local practitioners. If you are outside San Diego, CA, please visit www.hypnobirthing.com & go to Find a Practitioner to find a class near you.

www.AWellLivedLife.Net

www.AWellLivedLife.blogspot.com

Monday, September 29, 2008

HypnoBirthing & Interventions

This is from another HypnoBirthing practitioner from the UK. I thought it was worth sharing...

HB and Interventions


We teach our couples to negotiate and accept any 'necessary medical intervention', so I believe to describe a 'good/bad' HypnoBirth or refer to births as 'not a real HypnoBirth' is arrogant and bad psychology for our mums. It is nonetheless a HypnoBirth because HB at its best covers almost every eventuality.
In my early teaching days I was suitably evangelical and the 'p' words -pain & pushing - had no place in my vocabulary or my classes; the visualisations were exclusively of the 'perfect' HypnoBirth. When the inevitable 'necessary' interventions occurred - from a forceps delivery to elective c-section and emergency c-section - mums reported back to me that the lack of preparation for those eventualities had left them a bit lost at the time of their decisions to agree to the interventions and a sense of failure that they'd somehow done something wrong or 'failed' their HypnoBirthing 'final' - and leaving me wondering if I'd omitted something essential.


My own cousin had an amazing HypnoBirth - following a whole series of 'interventions' throughout her very difficult pregnancy. She had wanted a homebirth - massive fibroids made that inadvisable. Her baby was stubbornly breech, despite every turning technique and baby appeared to be doing his best to turn. My cousin was a vaginal breech herself; she changed consultant at 37 weeks to one who agreed to support a vaginal breech. At 41 weeks, the same consultant gently asked her to consider elective c-section. She took herself deep into self-hypnosis and following a dialogue with her body and her baby (ALL very valid HypnoBirthing skills) decided her baby needed help to be safely born. Her consultant at all times stressed that he would support whatever decision she came to - he respected her knowledge and ability to make informed decisions . . . which came purely from HypnoBirthing . . . and he would still support a vaginal birth if that was her decision.


She accepted the offer of the c-section, remaining calm, focusing love and good hormones - and oxygenated blood - down to her birthing body and her baby all the way and requesting lights/sounds/voices, etc. be considered for as gentle a delivery as possible. She adjusted her visualisations to include a gentle delivery and good recovery for herself and baby. This was an adjustment - a negotiated intervention, based on an informed decision (made possible by HypnoBirthing training), not a capitulation or, horrible word - failure.


Again, her surgeon did his best to give her a HypnoBirth. Baby was to go skin to skin with dad while she was 'busy' after the procedure and not to be taken to another room. As soon as possible, baby was to go to the breast. They modified their birthing preferences to take the changes into account - again, making their own informed decisions with every change that occurred. All good use of HypnoBirthing skills.


At the time of Jack's birth it was discovered the cord was twice around his neck, quite tight and thus and very short - which explained why he seemed to be making his best effort to turn and not quite making it. A vaginal breech could have been a bad decision.


As far as mum is concerned, HypnoBirthing worked for her and she's my greatest advocate. Without HypnoBirthing, she would have had no control or choices whatsoever - it would all have been taken over and become a totally medical procedure. As it was, she and her husband used all their HypnoBirthing knowledge and skills to effect the very best birthing experience they could in the ever changing circumstances surrounding Jack's birth day.


Jack - now 10 months old - is an amazing little boy - a glowing example of what we describe as a HypnoBaby, successfully and exclusively breastfed and the most blissful parents you could wish for.


So yes, HypnoBirthing works - DESPITE any circumstances that prevail. HypnoBirthing works - if the parents have total confidence in their ability to make informed decisions. Continuing calm and relaxed, breathing down and communicating with baby exactly as for a vaginal delivery - explaining to her body what is happening and visualising healing afterwards - as hypnotherapists, exactly what we would do to prepare for surgery, ensuring no post-op shock and good recovery.


My teaching now includes mention of this - and urges parents to adjust to any change in circumstances without disturbing the calm focus and continuing with their HypnoBirthing breathing until baby is in their arms.


With Birthing Preferences - they will make a few notes under an 'EVEN IF' section, then put them out of sight. I use the words "EVEN IF" in response to parents' question of "WHAT IF?" It suggests a smoother process and an acceptance that nature's way isn't always the quick and easy way, but HypnoBirthing will still be there for them - working away "as if by magic". Knowing the contingency is there reassures them of continuing control and keeps the fear away.


This is a long post - but this minor emphasis has changed things for my mums who do accept necessary intervention. They still feel empowered and, just as importantly, that HypnoBirthing didn't let them down when it counted.


Geraldine Vinall

Essex UK



Thank you Geraldine for your insight & wisdom...I feel it is our job as HypnoBirthing practitioners to educate our clients to have true informed consent & to empower our clients to have the best birth they can have. Your words ring true...



http://www.awelllivedlife.net/

http://www.awelllivedlife.blogspot.com/

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Important website & petition regarding Cytotec

This is an announcement of a new website that has articles and links about birth interventions. It was in the latest Midwifery Today. At first glance it looks like a useful site.

Please go to the FDA petition & sign it & then forward the link to your friends. This mis-use of a drug & abuse of women has to be stopped! I know there is an OB here in town (San Diego, CA) that uses it standard for all of his patients at 38 1/2 weeks. Shocking, but true!

Because misoprostol ("miso," "Cytotec") is being used more and more—without informed consent for induction and without being FDA-approved for use on pregnant women, a mother, Maddy Oden—who lost her daughter and grand-daughter because of this drug—has developed this Web site for us all. Maddy started the Tatia Oden French Memorial Foundation after her daughter, Tatia, and Tatia's daughter, Zorah, died after being given Cytotec. The foundation is dedicated to empowering woman, specifically in the area of childbirth.

The Web site is www.tatia.org and the e-mail is zorah@tatia.org.

www.AWellLivedLife.Net
www.AWellLivedLife.blogspot.com

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Empowerment & HypnoBirthing

This came to me via a fellow HypnoBirthing practitioner, Kathie Dolce...thanks! The article is meaningful for not only HypnoBirthing couples-to-be, but for anyone! Hope you find it helpful...
Carol

I've been thinking about "empowerment" and what it means when we say we want our HypnoBirthing couples to "empower" themselves (as nobody can "give" empowerment to another.) I found this article on the internet, and I think is expresses well what we strive to teach.
Kathie

Inside Out Empowerment: Free Your Mind, Open Your Heart, & Transform Your Life by Kim Oliver

I am so excited to be able to talk about my new process called Inside Out Empowerment. This is a process that’s developed after many years of study in the field of self-development, and it has a very solid foundation in Dr. Glasser’s Choice Theory®. This is a process that helps people identify their goals, uncover the unconscious programming that is the source of self-sabotage, and then consciously and intentionally develop and implement solid plans for transforming their lives into the lives they were destined for.

Seven Steps to Empowerment:

1. Admit Something is Wrong or Missing in Your Life
In order to do this you must let go of denial. If your life is already great, then you already understand Empowerment from the Inside Out. If not, take an honest look at your life and identify what is missing. Accept that it is time for a change. And clarify what you don’t want in your life.

2. Accept Personal Responsibility for Creating Whatever Life You Have Now
Through the Law of Attraction, a universal principle always in operation, you understand you have drawn to you everything you have in your life. Once you accept this fact, your next task is to relinquish blame, bitterness and victimhood. You created it; own it. However, don’t blame yourself because until now you didn’t know, but once you do, you have the responsibility for creating the life you do want. Another area under this section is the concept of taking responsibility for problem definition. Whenever you find yourself upset about something someone else is doing, ask yourself who is most upset about the situation—you or the other person. Chances are the other person isn’t upset at all. If you are the one most upset, then you own the problem and are responsible for its solution.

3. Clarify What You Really Want
In Step 1, you clarified what you don’t want. Now it’s time to turn that negative into the positive. If things were exactly as you want them to be, what would you have that you don’t have now? What could you get rid of that you don’t want? What could you do that you don’t do now? What could you stop doing that you feel you must do now? How would you be different as a person? What has to change?

4. Uncover and Examine Your Unconscious Programming
How many times have you determined a goal only to engage in self-sabotage? This is the product of your subconscious programming. Scientists know that you wire certain neurons together and create neural pathways in your brain. These pathways can create behavior that you do not consciously choose. However, you must understand that all behavior is purposeful, even those behaviors your subconscious creates. Everything you do is designed to get you something you want. This means that whenever you engage in self-sabotage there is at least one other thing you want in addition to what you are consciously aware of. Successfully moving forward requires shining the light on those unconscious desires so you can consciously and intentionally chose how you want to proceed. Affirmations, visualizations, meditation and energy psychology techniques can be very helpful with this step.

5. Accept What Is
You cannot change the past and worrying about the future only wastes this precious moment. Forgive yourself for anything from the past. Know you did the best you could at that time. Do not fight whatever presents itself in this moment. Every event in your life has equal positive and negative value. If you are only seeing the negative, search for the lesson and the gift.

6. Make a Plan to Move in the Direction You Want to Go
Create your vision of where you are going. Understand and enumerate your reasons for wanting to get there and then create and implement a step-by-step plan to accomplish your dream.

7. Create and Utilize Support Systems
Find an accountability partner. Join our free Inside Out Empowerment Mastermind Group and consider group or private coaching to give you the support and accountability piece you might need to stay on your path. Inside Out Empowerment helps you become a better leader, manager, parent, partner, friend, helper, teacher and most importantly a better YOU!

This system is NOT for you if you are looking for the easy way out. This is for those of you who want to REALLY get to the bottom of your limiting beliefs and the self-sabotage, preventing you from becoming who you were meant to be from the start! Until now, most “treatments” for this problem have been simply masking the symptoms so the pain was lessened but did little to treat the root cause. Start using the steps of Inside Out Empowerment today and you will begin to see real, monumental changes.

Kim Olver is a life, relationship and executive coach. Her mission is to help people get along better with the important people in their lives. She teaches people how to live from the inside out by empowering them to focus on the things they can change. If you are interested in learning more about our Mastermind group go to Inside Out Empowerment Mastermind

Group Article Source: http://www.positivearticles.com/

Kathie Dolce
Peaceful Baby Birthing Consultants
"Helping you to create a joyous pregnancy, a comfortable birth, and a loving family"
http://www.peacefulbaby.com/

Thanks again, Kathie, for sharing this article & resource.

http://www.awelllivedlife.net/
http://www.awelllivedlife.blogspot.com/

Saturday, January 19, 2008

A Letter to My Daughter

Hi-

This is a beautifully written letter by a HypnoBirthing mother to her daughter about her birth experience. Please share it with your friends who are expecting a baby & those that are thinking about having a baby. I think women need to know that they can have an empowering, wonderful, peaceful birth!

AWellLivedLife.blogspot.com


A Letter to My Daughter by Flavia Goncalves

Praising and mirroring the actions of women who are rupturing tradition, transforming taboos, or just simply excelling in their fields, helps us lay a foundation for a better, more respectful world for our daughters. The problem is that on the individual level, many women don't believe they possess what it takes to be a role model. I, for one, was one of them.



Unique women are unique because they believe in what they stand for. If I can get this message across to my daughter alone, I will consider my job done.



Dear baby girl,

Your name is Luma. It comes from the Latin word lumen, and it means light, illuminated, sparkle of life. Where I am from, to give birth ("dar a luz") means to give life. However, in our case, I believe it happened the other way around. In the miraculous moment of your birth, I was truly born. I learned that you were growing inside me a few days before Christmas. Although I do not observe any particular religious faith, I believe that you were sent to me as a gift. The motherly instincts I didn't imagine I had surfaced immediately; you became my reason to be. The first time I heard your heart beat, I shivered with emotion. When I saw you on the first sonogram, I cried. I was in a constant state of joy. My belly grew bigger as you grew inside me. I remember one particular night, when I was lying in bed reading; you suddenly slid your little foot across my belly. I placed my hand where I had felt you and you kicked again. We had discovered a game which we played quite often, for you were a very active baby. The more my belly grew the happier and prettier I felt.



Other than being very sleepy in the beginning and at the final months, the pregnancy itself was an easy one. Given that I was feeling good and everything seemed to be going well, your father and I asked the doctor about our chances of having a natural birth. The doctor was very supportive. He agreed that I was having a normal and healthy pregnancy and our chances of a successful natural birth were high.



Labor pain? Yes, I did think about it. I guess this issue crosses the mind of every single pregnant woman. It will probably cross yours too someday. Fear of pain. There was nothing I could do about the pain, but there was something I could do about fear and so I did. I found a HypnoBirthing coach and I followed her instructions diligently, every day, many times a day. I knew she could help me. HypnoBirthing, or Hypnosis, is nothing more than a deep state of concentration. I practiced meditation and relaxation. I repeated my affirmations (a long list of beliefs) morning, afternoon and evening. I worked on slow long deep breaths. My confidence grew stronger every single day and the fear vanished.



I was met with skepticism and disapproval from several friends and family. First, several people didn't know what hypnosis was all about and were skeptical of me trying it. Second, my birth choice caused alarm; after all, c-sections in Miami are expected by most. Miami's c-section rates are among the highest in the USA and the developed countries. Friends and family from Sao Paulo also were puzzled. C-section rates there are the highest in the world! To my disappointment, some people tried to discourage me by describing horrible birth stories; others would just say that I would never be able to withstand the pain, that I just would not be able to do it. The truth is, Luma, that I did not know. I couldn't know what the outcome would be. But I didn't get discouraged.



At this point, you must be thinking how brave and courageous your mommy is, but I wasn't. This is where you come in. During my entire life, I rarely took credit for my successes, or believed in my capabilities, and worse yet, several times I didn't stand up for myself when I should have. But in this case, I was doing it for you. Without blinking, I would do it a thousand times for you. The new me had been conceived. A world of possibilities opened up to me.



While my doctor was genuinely supportive of my birth choice, I found out too late that his practice colleagues were not as agreeable. Therefore, I decided to change doctors. Because the pregnancy was very advanced, no other practice risked taking me in. I was disappointed, of course, but still determined. So I took a leap of faith. You were already thirty-six weeks old when I left the practice.



I put you and myself into the care of Miriam, our midwife. I felt an immediate relief the minute I stepped in the Maternity Center. Miriam was nurturing, calm, and never condescending. She empathized with my situation and was willing to help me, even if that meant finding another doctor. Miriam just felt right and I stuck with her. To make matters even better, Miriam offered water births, an option that was very attractive to me. You were forty and a half weeks old, in position and very low, but still pretty comfortable inside.



To help you, I went on long walks, scrubbed the bath tub, and swam every day. Until one day my laps in the pool were interrupted by this tightening on my belly, that wouldn't stop. Calmly, I told your dad, who was swimming next lane over, that time had arrived. We went home, I took a long shower, your grandma gathered things we needed to take, and after Miriam checked my progress we all went to the Maternity Center. The ambiance of our room at the Birthing Center was perfect: it was calm, soothing music played, the lights were dimmed, and there were few candles flickering. I sat in bed and concentrated on slow long breaths and pretty soon I fell asleep. Yes, I fell asleep. When I finally woke up, the contractions were almost back to back and very intense. It was time to get into the water and just as I did I felt a difference. I was really aware of my body and you and the changes that were quickly taking place. Nonetheless, I lost notion of time. During the breaks between contractions, I relaxed so much that I would fall into a deep sleep and even have dreams. Grandma held my head while I drifted off. Your father was my link to a regular state of consciousness; he kept me hydrated; he caressed my belly. I never felt pain, except for a couple of times when I had to pipi, first, because the power of gravity outside of the water was tremendous, second, because, I couldn't concentrate on the surges and do pipi at the same time. Otherwise, things were happening as I pictured they would.



When I felt it was time I asked your dad to fetch Miriam. Your grandma had already positioned herself, my back towards her; she held my head and caressed my hair. Now your dad plunged into the water in front of me. He described the evolution of your birth, his voice trembled with ecstasy. Sometimes emotion took over him and all he could say was, "Oh, my God, Oh my God!" His happiness and pride strengthened me. Miriam was also a key person, as a HypnoBirthing coach herself, she knew when I was losing concentration and would bring me right back. We all worked together. When you were ready to come out, your dad's hands were there to hold you. Then he placed you on my chest. I never knew I could love so much. While I was holding and looking at you mesmerized, your grandma whispered in my ear, "You and your daughter were born at exactly the same hour: 4:10am." I smiled at the coincidence and thought to myself that you had given me a second chance to actually live. I was proud!



I was so proud and happy. If I had to put in just a few words what your birth experience felt like, I would say that it was the most intense physical and spiritual experience I have ever lived. Such an empowering experience still resonates. I am a different person. I live life to the fullest. I invite challenge, I face my fears, and I take advantage of opportunities. I am still human, though. Sometimes I am scared, sometimes I fail, and sometimes I make mistakes. So forgive me, because I will fail you. I will make mistakes, but I promise to always love you. I promise that I will work everyday to be a better and stronger person than I was yesterday. I promise to be a role model to you, so you can grow up as a strong, confident woman. I promise to live my dreams, because I want you to live yours.



Love always, Mom.



My story is an account of what we can do or what we can become if we truly believe in ourselves. It describes what happens when we free ourselves from outside judgment and pre-conceived beliefs. In my case, believing in me has caused a chain-reaction of self accomplishments. After birthing my daughter naturally, in the water and without pain, when many around me considered it impossible, I engaged in many other challenging activities. I started running and became a marathon runner and a triathlete. Currently I am training for a half ironman (a 1.2 mile swim, a 56 mile bike ride, and a 13.1 run event). I also went back to school and took up art classes. I plan to flourish in the art world. Lastly, after twenty years I started writing again.